Out of grief comes hope: pregnancy, bereavement and the place of hypnotherapy

Both my sons were born early; not dangerously early, but early enough for it to give us a fright first time around.

In between my two successful pregnancies, I also suffered a late miscarriage due to picking up a Group B Strep infection. It led to a spiral of depression which, being a generally optimistic person, I had never expected, and I doubt any of my close family and friends had expected either. Although I didn’t realised it at the time, I was actually suffering depression caused by the loss of a child. It was a pretty dark and frightening time, as anyone who has ever suffered from depression will know. I suspect it hit me even harder as it came almost two months after the miscarriage when I had expected to be ‘getting better’.

Like many women of my generation I wanted a quick fix for my depression (the equivalent of a couple of paracetamols), and tried a ridiculous amount of different counselling and therapies to do so. In hindsight, I know now, the best thing I could have done really is just to have taken some time out to let the natural and eventual healing that follows a bereavement of any kind take place.

I must have tried about 3 or 4 different types of counselling before I found something that actually worked: clinical hypnotherapy.

It proved to be the most calming and regenerative thing I could have done. My hypnotherapist, Julie Cleasby, based in Hove, provided me with amazing support, optimism and guidance during a very dark time, which I cannot thank her enough for.

A look at her website gives an insight into the various treatments she is able to provide: http://www.begintolive.co.uk.

Julie continued to support in the dark days that followed my miscarriage, and  quite far into my third successful pregnancy, and filled me with such optimism about what was a very risky and scary pregnancy, that I would recommend her services,  without hesitation to anyone trying to grips with a situation which at first might seem completely out of your control and unmanageable. She broke it down into all the various components, and made me see how much optimism and positivity could come out of an apparently dark and hopeless moment in my life.

Julie’s naturally chirpy nature belies the breadth of her expertise which is not limited to just dealing with depression and bereavement, but encompasses NLP and Integral Eye Movement Therapy (designed to deal with panic attacks), as well as life coaching and hypnobirthing services.

I don’t know whether hypnotherapy would work for everyone, but it is something that should definitely not be dismissed. I imagine it is very much dependent on finding a therapist with whom you can connect. But once you have found one, it can prove to be a complete life line.


  1. Hypnotherapy can help not only the grieving mother, but the father as well. Grief tends to be built on an underlying sense of guilt, that one was not good enough, or did something wrong. Hypnotherapy reframes these erroneous impressions that reside in the subconscious. Most other therapies work only with the conscious mind, and that becomes their greatest limitation, and why it generally takes a long time. Dealing directly with the subconscious via hypnosis is what makes hypnotherapy so fast and effective.

    • Thanks for your comment Steve. It’s easy to forget the father in this situation, although my husband seemed to have had a far better coping mechanism to cope with his grief.

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